Strain
by The Once Caged Bird
Summary: When Clint is injured, the x-ray's reveal some far worse news. Natasha does not take it very well, and the only one that notices is Thor. Attempts at comforting and new understandings of teammates ensue. Drabble.


**A/N: A nice guest commented that I should make this weekly, so here you go ^,^ (I will _try) _Meanwhile, I'm off to finish up the last scene for the next chapter of WoL! ~toodles~**

**2nd drabble in The Avengers Misadventures**

**EDIT: This is not a new story, just separating out the chapters of the Avengers Misadventures ^^;**

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Main Characters: Thor and Natasha

Theme: General

Pairings: Slight Clintasha

Rating: PG

2. Strain

This wasn't how they'd agreed it would happen.

After an admittedly rough night of drinking, Natasha and Clint had made a pact that if they were going to die, they were going to die with style. Either fighting for their country – which they both thought sounded a little _cliché, _though still kind of cool – dying on a mission, or maybe even sacrificing themselves to take out their enemies. However they went, though, it was affirmed that 1) it must be awesome enough to be worthy of two such badasses, and 2) it must be together. After the hangovers had faded though, they both laughed it off as idiocy. After all, in their line of work, there were no guarantees… and you only got a choice in how you went if you were very, very lucky.

Even so, Natasha couldn't help balk at the wrongness of it all, as she watched the doctors wheel her friend out on a gunnery and down the hall for more scans. He offered her his best thumbs up but Natasha could see the fear in his eyes, and her gut clenched in rage and helplessness.

This wasn't how it was supposed to end.

Thor stood back with the rest of the team as they watched the bowman being escorted down the hall for more experiments. Briefly he felt keen discomfort. In Asgard, no warrior wished for their comrades to see them weakened or injured. On the battlefield, of course it was inevitable, but once home, the warriors retreated to recoup from their injuries with family or the healers. Loki always said it was so that when the warriors met their shield brothers again, they could boast of their combat prowess without anyone being able to recall them bawling like a woman over their wounds. Thor wasn't so sure about that, but he knew warriors had their pride and that the Hawkeyed one was a stout warrior indeed. Thor felt obligated to be uncomfortable by the attention on the man's behalf.

As their comrade disappeared through the swinging doors, Thor let his attention drift to the Hawk's woman – Natasha. She stood with her shoulders rigid and her stance tightly controlled. As if waiting for the chance to strike down all those stupid enough to provoke her ire.

It was, perhaps, little wonder then that the rest of the warriors wandered off to see to their own needs. They may have simply sensed her anger and given way to the instinct to flee, or felt that Natasha would perhaps prefer to deal with her emotions alone. Thor knew not.

He did, however, recognize that look upon her face – the one that spoke of vulnerability and fury that could not be directed at any one thing or person because the problem was not the fault of either. Yes, Thor knew that look _very _well, and he knew that, despite what his teammates might believe, it was not the best course of action to simply allow those emotions to fester.

The Thunderer shook his head and admitted that his friends were more than likely exhausted and hadn't noticed their lady's plight. Thor supposed that left him to attempt to comfort her. Somewhere in the back of his head, Loki was laughing derisively.

_Not in __**that **__way, brother, _Thor thought to himself in exasperation as he stepped forward to tap the spy on the shoulder. She turned to look over her shoulder at him, expression as smooth as a sculpture. Thor had to admire her control, for he knew how much he lacked it.

"Come," he rumbled quietly, "we will do no more good here." He tilted his head towards the exit and she nodded sharply, following him out of the medical wing.

They said nothing as Thor led them up to the coffee room on the second floor, but he found he didn't mind. Her thoughts were obviously still far away, and he had no desire to break their thread or make her feel obligated to relinquish her fear and behave as she ought. Despite what his brother said, Thor knew the benefits of silence.

Together, they made their coffees and took seats together at the table. Thor was content to wait as long as need be for her to speak about what was bothering her, if she chose to speak of it at all. While warriors might try to hide their pain, it was never good for a person to hide their anger. Thor had seen what that could do first hand. And so he would allow her some time, and if she chose not to speak of what ailed her, then Thor supposed he would have to address the matter himself.

Surprisingly, it took less time than he anticipated before Natasha voiced her thoughts.

"Why are you here Thor?" She asked distantly, as if not really caring one way or another if he answered. Still, Thor knew a potential trap when he saw one. How many times, after all, had Loki asked him the exact same question from behind bars?

"I am here because I know that, were I you, and that were Jane downstairs, I would not wish to be alone right now."

"And if I wanted to be alone?" she asked more sharply.

"Do you?" Thor asked seriously. He knew what Loki's answer would have been. He wondered at Natasha's.

She was silent for a long moment, perhaps considering his diplomatic offer for solitude. Eventually she gave a very minute shake of her head, though she didn't speak. It was as close to admitting weakness as Thor had ever seen from the assassin.

After a moment, he saw her eyes cloud over again, shielding the world from seeing her worries and her fear. Her anger. Thor took another sip of coffee as he considered what he should say. Odd, he thought, how Loki would have been far better equipped for handling such a situation. Then again, he had noticed off and on the similarities between his brother and his teammate. Perhaps if he were to speak to her as he might have once spoken to Loki…?

Then thoughts of Loki reminded him that he had once been in a situation not so different from the one Natasha faced now. It was a place to start, at the least.

"When I first came to your planet," he began, breaking the silence slowly, "you know that I was pursued by my brother - or rather, my brother's designs on my permanent removal from Asgard?" He saw her nod of acknowledgement and took that as a sign to continue.

"I did not, at the time, understand why or how it had come to that – to that fight. It was... unexpected, on my part. I did not know where Loki's anger had come from, but it was deep, and it was bitter. Emotional wounds, dealt mostly by myself, that he had allowed to fester for centuries," Thor did not look up to see if she knew where he was going with this. Likely she did.

"After he fell, I truly did not know what to do with myself. I was confused, and I was hurt, but more than any other feeling, I was angry," Thor paused to take a deep breath. "Asgard felt my wrath for many months, and I had countless floods to apologize for when the farmers were brave enough to complain about it." He gave a half-hearted smile that didn't reach his eyes as he finally met the assassin's gaze.

"There are times, Natasha, that we do not see a disaster or a tragedy in the making. Most of the time, there is little we can do to prevent it. But we must never let ourselves hoard our despair or rage – truly I speak from experience when I say that it will consume you and make you bitter, and I cannot imagine your hawk wishing that life for you."

Natasha took a deep breath that sounded like she was struggling to steady herself. Her eyes were unreadable and her face was as emotionless as a Norn's, but her whole frame was rigid with tension. She was still angry, but she was fighting her emotions, trying to keep them under control. Thor thought it best to address her feelings honestly.

"You are angry," he stated. Natasha took another deep breath.

"I am," she acknowledged. Thor waited a moment to see if she would say more. It usually worked with Loki when he needed to rage but was unwilling to release his emotions.

"But if you are suggesting," Natasha continued levelly, "that I should express my anger, then I will have to disagree. Some people deal with their emotions differently, and in my profession, one shouldn't even have them." She paused as if mulling over what she'd just admitted, so Thor prompted her.

"But you do," he reasoned.

"Yes. And it's a weakness I should have gotten rid of years ago," she said coolly. Thor's brows furrowed in consternation. That was not the reaction he had hoped for.

But then Natasha relented, "So far I've been rather unsuccessful," she mused with a hint of wryness. "I even have friends, or so it would appear." Thor quirked his eyebrows in surprise, but the assassin wasn't done.

"I appreciate the concern Thor, but I have had more than enough experience dealing with my own emotions – I can handle them well enough," she said, not unkindly. Thor nodded in understanding, though he didn't believe her anymore than he would have Loki.

Cradling his coffee mug absently, he said, as if musing aloud, "What then, angers you so?" Natasha pursed her lips.

"Helplessness. Like you weren't able to help Loki, I can't do anything for Clint."

"And if Agent Barton were to die from his injuries?" Natasha hesitated.

"That's the problem – it's not even an injury," Natasha shook her head in what might have been labeled frustration. "It's an illness… a sort of malformation inside the body that can easily kill or cripple a person, though I assume they don't have that in Asgard." Thor shook his head.

"No, we have no such ailments in Asgard. However, consider this – if this malformation proves to be dangerous, could Agent Barton be in any better hands for healing?" Natasha closed her eyes briefly.

"No, most likely not."

"Then what you are is not helpless, for that defines beings with no one left to turn to in their hour of need," Thor said patiently. "What you are lacking is trust. Trust in the healers and in Barton's own strength. He will come through, in the end, and he will not thank you for doubting him." Natasha's eyes blazed at the thought, just as Thor had hoped.

"Sometimes trust isn't enough, Thor. Sometimes people die, or betray you, or leave you and there is nothing you can do about it. Trusting blindly will only bring you pain in the end," she said calmly, concisely. But Thor felt the heat behind her words and wondered what her limit would be. If it were Loki, he'd be getting pretty close.

"But what else can you do?" The thunderer challenged. "To worry or rage or even to close yourself off completely would be no different than hoping for the best." Natasha gave him a considering look. She was taking him seriously.

"You are very optimistic Thor," she admitted. "Almost overly so, in my opinion – but then, you can afford it. I can't. I have to be realistic. It's what keeps me sane." Thor sensed she was attempting to end to conversation and he conceded gracefully, if not a little unwillingly. He would not press her further. Natasha was every bit as stubborn as his brother, but she was not the same person. Loki would have exploded with what was truly bothering him after Thor's continued pestering. Or at least, the Loki of his youth would have. Natasha had complete and ruthless control though, and had held her emotions in check. Thor had to admit he was impressed. Natasha had the poise of a queen, even in her despair. It was something to behold.

With a nod, Natasha rose from her seat and went to the sink to rinse out her empty cup. Thor, too, rose and inclined his head in respect. He would not waste her time with empty apologies for bothering her. He did not regret it. And she recognized the attempts for what they were. So he simply settled for a silent acknowledgement of her strength. Somewhat tiredly, he decided he'd like another cup of coffee before leaving himself.

Natasha, for her part, thanked him and headed for the door.

Thor refilled his cup and resumed his seat. Rubbing his forehead, thinking she'd slipped out – so often she was completely noiseless in her movements – he didn't expect her soft voice to come from the doorway behind him.

"It's unfair, what's happened to Clint," she murmured without looking at him. "This isn't the way he should die – it's not worthy of him and I hate the thought of it." She stopped speaking and Thor turned to see her leaning against the doorway with the door half closed between them. She met his eyes frankly.

"But I won't give up on him – not yet."

Thor favored her with a real smile then and her features softened. With a nod to the Norse god, she turned to actually leave when she paused and commented over her shoulder.

"If you find your night as sleepless as mine's going to be, I'll be in the gym."

And then she was gone - as smooth and silent as a cat's footfall.

Thor quietly smiled to himself and considered her offer and his success. It would seem that she had drawn some hope from his attempt at comforting, and that was the best he could have asked for. He was, after all, still learning the best ways to work with his teammates. Natasha, it would seem, favored venting her stress through physical exercise, which was a far cry better than bottling it up inside in Thor's humble opinion. And far be it from him to deny her a partner to support her punching bags. He himself could use a round or two with a few of the specialized sparring dummies to release some of the emotional strain he was only now truly feeling.

So, without much more thought on the matter, Thor rose, drained the last of his coffee, and made his way to the gym, where he was sure he'd be spending many long days and nights until they heard word on the Hawk's recovery.

After that, Thor decided, he would like to take a short trip back to Asgard to thank his brother. And a small grin crossed his features at the thought of the look Loki was going to give him when he did.

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Another short featuring Thor and Natasha. I always wondered how all the Avengers learned to work with each other on a more personal level, especially considering how different all of their personalities are. I'd like to think that Thor would be one of the first to figure out how to deal with the real Natasha. And I'd like to think Natasha appreciates the honesty. This one was a little more morose than the last, but I have funny ones as well. (Oh, and Clint is okay! no worries!). My headcanon was that the unfriendly prod to the eye he got last chapter led the doctors to discover a tumor that could lead to blindness or death if it was malevolent. Fortunately it was nice and benign. Anyways, I'll stop rambling now ^,^


End file.
